Friday TORTURE Night

Yesterday I joined my colleagues and friends on a forty-five minute trip to the north. Our motives were different, though. Shane and a few others wanted to participate in an event viewed by me as being
MASOCHIST
and
INSANE!
I, on the other hand, wanted to enjoy the night and watch the others suffer at the hands of everyone's favorite buffalo wings.

According to Shane, the rules of the competition were simple: eat six wings in twelve minutes; spiciest selection; no drink; no wiping your paws or mouth. They expected a somewhat pained yet short task.

Well, six and twelve can be two different things according to how you organize them above. When we arrived in the northern city and found a seat in the crapped buffalo wings restaurant we discovered that Shane had unintentionally relayed the information to us--you were supposed to consume TWELVE WINGS in SIX MINUTES.

As they waited for all the contestants to pile in and receive their deathplates, I socialized with some of the others and played with Adam, the puma (one of the past crushes, a twenty-four year old graduate student). When the spicy wings come, however, the entire mood escalated.

The first three persons to walk into the furnace were Will, Mike/Heath, and Matty. Will was having trouble but hid it well. I could see that Matty was tearing as the heat invaded his taste buds and attacked at his constitution (Adam stated sometime during the event that "Better be glad he invested points into his Constitution.", a tRPG reference). Heath handled everything in a calm manner, even appearing to actually be enjoying the meal. We all cheered and picked at the three of them as they painfully ate the hellish poultry.

The three of them all pulled through and headed off to the restrooms to clean themselves up. Will, though, bailed soon after; I do not think he received his "crown". A few minutes later, Shane received his basket of twelve wings and proceeded to attempt the ordeal...solo.

The whole audience nagged at him and ridiculed his tears as he silently consumed the fiery chicken. His wife and we backed him up throughout the entirety of the challenged; he succeeded as well.

In the end, though, it was all fun and games. I do not think anyone meant true animosity towards the sufferers. I had a blast (although I did get a bit of a stomachache, and my food was not near as spicy as what the contestanst had to bear) that night and was bouncing around in the van the whole journey back (three glasses of sweet tea and a grande chocolate chip frappuchino from the cafe was mostly to blame). I would gladly do something like this again!


drewcaine